Sure, Apple’s AI-enhanced Siri rollout turned into a massive SNAFU that gave the Cupertino tech giant a rare black eye, but the company won’t quit on Apple Intelligence just yet. The latest reports suggest Apple will try and sell consumers on at-home robots set to arrive in the next two years, along with a version of its AI assistant that sports a face and “personality.” If the rumors are true, the company won’t stuff AI into a ball-shaped bot that users hopefully won’t trip over, but will put it on your tabletop in the form of a robot arm with a screen. That, and more Apple smart home products, are allegedly set to launch within the next two years.

This robot, which my tech-addled brain can’t stop referring to as “Apple Intelligence on a stick,” will reportedly be able to interact with users on a more personal basis. We’ve heard about this supposed home robotics project before, but Bloomberg’s star Apple leaker Mark Gurman wrote on Wednesday that Apple wants to give the bot the ability to interject itself into conversations as if it were an active participant. The iPad mini-sized screen at the end of an extending robot arm could show a cartoonish face that would be the most personified version of Siri yet. Apple has reportedly tested two versions of Siri’s virtual identity. One is an animated version of the classic Finder logo on Mac. Another looks like a Memoji. I desperately hope Apple opts for the former.

If you’re trying to picture this AI in action, think less of the Samantha AI from the 2013 movie Her and imagine the Luxo Jr. mascot from Pixar Studios. This AI could be playful, awkward, and maybe even a little bashful. Apple showcased how this AI would work in a research paper it published back in January. The prototype AI framework, which Apple called ELEGNT, can follow commands and users’ movements, but it may interact in more subtle ways that make it seem far more personable. Instead of outright telling you the weather forecast on command, the bot may look out the window, look back, and then say it’s sunny with a chance of rain.

[embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHJa_CyJjdc[/embed]

As fun as it sounds, what matters more is if it’s as functional as selecting an app on a screen. Home AI like Amazon’s Alexa+ has rolled out slowly over the past few months. Early reviews of Amazon’s at-home chatbot have noted that it can hold a conversation, but it’s still not good enough to recognize specific context for your queries. Apple reportedly still has designs on humanoid robots, or at least something that will roll on wheels like TCL’s AiMe or Samsung’s Ballie. Those are still just prototypes, but we’ll more likely see more Apple smart home products, like a doorbell camera and other home security devices.

Gurman’s slate of anonymous sources suggests Apple Intelligence on a stick may arrive in 2027, though we’ll get a more subdued version that’s closer to a smart speaker with a display before that. That device sounds like a HomePod version of an Echo Spot or Google Nest Hub, though this device should be wall-mountable. It won’t have the conversational Siri, but it will have access to note-taking, video calls, and smart home controls through all the usual standby apps like Calendar, FaceTime, and Apple Music. All this could run in a new operating system that is currently codenamed Charismatic.

None of this push for robotics will matter if Apple can’t get its house in order, and that starts with Apple Intelligence and Siri. Apple is reportedly still planning to launch what it’s dubbed internally as “LLM Siri,” according to Gurman. That voice assistant may be available by spring next year, though we’ve been burned before on dates for Apple’s previous AI rollouts. This new version may feature yet another visual redesign to help us forget about the first time Apple tried giving Siri an AI makeover. Whether Apple opts for in-house models or outside LLMs like Anthropic’s Claude, we’ll first have to deal with AI infecting our smartphones before we ever wrestle with any AI-enabled robotic arms.